Oh therapist, my therapist,
standing outside your door;
Inside battles rage
like an internal tug-of-war.
A part of me wants to flee -
it shouts, “escape, run away!”
Another voice pleads quietly
“it might be different why not stay?”
Know, it’s not easy for me, dear therapist,
you need to know this from the start;
Allowing you behind the curtains
that protect my naked heart.
I’ve nowhere else to turn,
I’ve no one left to tell,
life feels so confusing
what once was heaven seems like hell.
So, be gentle with me dear therapist,
don’t be fooled by indifference and sass.
Your giving up would add a crack
to this fragile soul of glass.
I beg you for something special;
tis’ my life it’s not a game,
Please be different from friends and family
not simply more of the same.
I know not who you are, my therapist,
but should you truly care,
more than advice and your techniques,
give me your heart and listening ear.
And when I step inside I’ll be accompanied
with sad echoes from the past;
I’ll bring the devil to your door
and I’m frightened you won’t last.
I’m scared you’ll get lost in my behaviors,
overwhelmed by the things you see;
Please be wise enough to know
the forest from the trees.
I desperately yearn to soar and fly,
but will you see me lacking wings?
Like a person without a voice,
who foolishly wants to sing?
Respect me for my feelings;
speak my thoughts both good and bad,
Allowing me to laugh and cry,
to be angry, hateful, mad.
Do you view the world in color,
wispy yellows, gentle blues, soft lilac?
Or, am I fated to be labeled
with extremes of white and black?
Be honest and be truthful,
be genuine and please not fake,
be big enough to say “I’m sorry”
when you err and make mistakes.
Help me learn to dance with Life
a ballerina at the ball;
Believe in me, oh therapist mine,
but be okay with when I fall.
Most importantly, when like dust in wind
all vestiges of hope seem lost,
like a timekeeper will you hold hope for me,
no matter what the cost?
So, here I stand dear therapist
prepared to follow as you lead true;
And as I enter your cocoon,
remember, I’m only human, same as you.
Ahh, so many things to tell you,
I’ve so much more to say,
sadly, these will remain unspoken
never to see the light of day…
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